Thursday, March 10, 2011

Hot Elf Dude Welcomes You To The OSR

For an explanation of what's going on with this post, try here at the Underdark Gazette.
Meanwhile, a d30 Table:
d30 Unnatural Character Origins
  1. I'm from a planet where everyone has my super-power
  2. I'm from Middle America in the '80s
  3. I used to be a turtle
  4. I'm you, but from the future
  5. I'm your father, but from Earth 11 where all the genders are reversed
  6. I feel asleep a thousand years ago
  7. My home planet exploded
  8. I was born of the love of a moonbeam for a dewdrop
  9. I woke up in a vat of goo
  10. I started life as a gray cube found on a dusty shelf
  11. My parallel universe collapsed with this one but somehow I'm still here
  12. I was raised by snakes
  13. I'm evolved from a simian species from the literature of your choice
  14. I'm evolved from an insectoid species from the comic book of your choice
  15. This is actually just my larval form
  16. This isn't my body and I want my body back
  17. This isn't my body and its owner wants it back
  18. I'm a super-intelligent gorilla brain--I just took this body because I liked it
  19. I'll be a god again once I find my trusty whatsit
  20. My father is the Sky God and he will acknowledge me just as soon as he sees how great I am
  21. I'm a stone robot
  22. I change shape every 28 days, but it's not really my call
  23. I'm a freakishly intelligent squirrel
  24. I'm a figure from an enchanted painting
  25. I'm a snow wife
  26. I'm a mermaid who sprouted legs (I might have a debt with the Octopus Lady)
  27. I used to be a toy
  28. I haven't always been a toy
  29. I may look like an elf but I'm a flower quickened by starseed
  30. In my village we all breed like Mogwais so it's hard to tell us apart


Stuart said...

Good to see somebody thought to include a hot elf dude. :)

Grendelwulf said...

He's too sexy for that hair...

Christopher B said...

Hot elf guy - that was my second concept for a post (but I couldn't pass up the opportunity to post a chick pic :P). Glad someone else thought of it and ran with it. :D

I love that list! That is so stolen - er, borrowed. ;D

Arkhein said...

Well, it had to happen. Equal rights. ACK.


- Ark

Aaron Nuttall said...

I'm gald you guys appreciate the Man Elf. My wife wants me to tell you that I think I have better eyebrows than Legolas. It's my Basque blood, no doubt.